How To Be An Annoying Usher
- Show up drunk. I mean REALLY drunk.
- SQUEEZE as many people as you can in each row before opening up the
next one. We're going for efficiency here.
- Two words: "Bathroom Key"
- Insist on frisking all female guests. Body cavity searches are
- "March" down the aisle and speak with a German accent as you show
people to their seats.
- Urinate in front of each row you are about to open up. Make comments
about marking your territory.
- Pretend you are the Phantom of the Opera. Lurk in the shadows when
- Offer your "services" to all guests.
- Offer guests the opportunity to be included in your plans for world
- Insist on a pants-free environment.
Submitted By: Robert Klugiewicz
Apr 13, 1997 18:07
This joke is rated: PG