The Blue Brick

Once a year, the entire town of Podunckville, USA has a competition for all of the local citizens. The object of the competition is to throw a brick into the air and see how long it takes to come down. The person with the longest time wins. Following is a recreation of one of the competitions.

It was a calm sunny day in Podunckville and the time was just right for throwing bricks. The contestants have reached an all time high this year with a grand total of 5. In no particular order, they are Jimmy, Bill, Wendy, Hank, and last year's champion Brian (no relation). The competition will start in one minute.

First to the throwing block is Bill. He is a 6'2", 250 lb construction worker from the neighboring township. Upon stepping up on the block he gets the OK from the official brick timer and he lets his yellow brick fly with a tremendous grunt. The onlookers gaze in wonder as the yellow brick comes screaming to Earth in a pace-setting 45 seconds.

Next up is Wendy. This is her second year in the competition after coming in second by only .01 seconds. (That's a lot of seconds) She steps up to the throwing block with her standard red brick and gets the OK from the time keeper. Using her windmilling technique she lets the brick fly as the crowd cheers her on. Much to Bill's disappointment, the brick doesn't fall until 1 minute and 5 seconds have elapsed. Wendy is pleased with her time and feels that she has a good shot at the title.

Hank steps to the block for his attempt with his lucky white brick. Hank gets an approving nod from the time keeper, and begins his two-handed brick toss. Much to the enjoyment and delight of the onlookers Hank hits himself square in the forehead and knocks himself out cold. The medical crew rush to his aid as they pull his limp body off the block.

Brian, last year's champ, steps up next. Full of confidence and armed with his trusty green brick he gets the go ahead from the official time keeper of the 1996 Brick Throwing Championship. With his patented hurricane shoulder toss he lets the brick fly with all his might. The brick goes out of sight after 30 seconds and doesn't reappear until 55 seconds have passed. Much to Wendy's disappointment, the brick hits the ground with a resounding thud after 1 minute and 26 seconds. This is a new record in the brick throwing competition. His title seems to be locked up.

The last competitor is Jimmy. Every year Jimmy enters the competition and every year he finishes dead last. After Hank's unfortunate mishap Jimmy has new life. He steps to the block with his favorite blue brick in his hand and gets the signal from the timer. With his entire 105 lb frame, Jimmy lets the brick fly with all his might. To the surprise of Brian it appears that Jimmy may have a shot at beating his time. The brick disappears from sight after 32 seconds and the crowd waits anxiously for the return. 1 minute goes by.....1 minute 10 seconds

.......1 minute 20 seconds
.......1 minute 30 seconds - he has the title
.......2 minutes
.......3 minutes
.......15 minutes
.......1 hour
The crowd starts to wonder what happened
.......2 hours
.......3 hours
.......5 hours
.......10 hours

The crowd gets tired of waiting for the brick to come back and they go home.

Confused? Read the airplane joke.

Submitted By: Anonymous

This joke is rated: PG
Tags: Misc