A 70-year old woman was sitting on her porch when she noticed a dusty old lamp sitting on the ground at her feet. She picked up the lamp and rubbed the dust off. Sure enough, a genie apppeared.
"I will grant you three wishes," the genie boomed.
The old woman said, "I want to be young and beautiful."
POOF - she was gorgeous and young and was feeling great.

"What will be your second wish," the genie asked.
The woman said, "I want to have enoungh money so I will be rich until I die."
POOF- there were huge stacks of $100 bills covering the porch and front yard.

"What will be your last wish," the genie asked. The woman thought a second and then said, "I want you to change my mangy old cat Thomas into a handsome, young prince."
POOF- there was a very handsome man standing next to the woman with ribbons on his smartly dressed chest.

Thomas turned to the woman and said, "Now don't you regret getting me neutered."