: Dick Long (Chair), I.M. Hornee, Marcia Baud-Acious,
Willy Mauser (on leave), Kristine Minx, Candy Samples, Claude
Human Sexuality courses focus on the processes of human
reproduction, mating and copulation. Among the questions
raise by human sexuality are these: How does the average
American get some? How can I get some? How can I satisfy my
mate? How can I get some without spending a lot of money?
How many different positions are there? How can I get some
without begging? How can I get a lot? Human sexuality
offers both a grasp of the various answers that have been
provided for these questions and how to choose among these
Since a core of questions as well as a base of
experience to draw on are important, students will be
expected to take the introductory course, Human Sexuality
101. This course provides the necessary background for
further pursuit in the course.
Recent graduates from the department have undertaken
careers in a number of different fields: service/customer
satisfaction, filmmaking, government service, law, teaching,
and the clergy - particularly envangalism.
Advanced placement can be given with instructor approval
or demonstration of mastery of techniques. Senior citizen auditors are welcome for all classes.
THE MAJOR: A minimum of 32 credits. Required are
Introduction to Human Sexuality 101, three 200-level courses,
and two 300-level courses
101 Introduction to Human Sexuality
- An overview of human
sexuality. Students are guided through the rudiments of
sexual activity. The question "How can I get some?" will be
a central point throughout the semester. Other areas of
study include contraception, the financial aspect of sex,
music and sex, innuendo, candlelight and sex, and expensive
dinners and sex. The question "How can I get alot?" will be
examined late in the semester, though the question will never
be answered. Lab required.
131 Introduction to Sexual Techniques
- An introduction to
various sexual techniques that will be required for
successful completion of the major. Students will be taken
through kissing and light petting to heavy fondling to actual
intercourse in as many positions as time allows. Recommended
for those with little background in coursework or for those
who need refresher training. One lab a week.
209 History of Sex
- This course traces the history of sex
from its beginning in the Garden of Eden up until present
times. Particular attention will be payed to positions; from
the early Archimedes' screw to the Missionary position
adopted by most missionaries and everybody else. Famous
(censored) works will be read in an attempt to uncover the
vast and sorted history of sex.
- An extensive look at sexual fetishes and
fantasies. First semester is an examination of feather
dusters, silk scarves, toe licking, and feather boas. Second
semester deals with leather, handcuffs, ropes, chains, and
whips, and seven-inch spiked heels. Prerequisite: Your own
230 Teasing and Saying No
- The hazards as well as the
rewards of teasing. Male participation will consist of oral
exercises and economic consideration (begging and buying
expensive gifts), while the female participation will involve
oral exercises and biological introspection (saying no and
getting a headache)
- Special attention will be paid to cold
showers. Prerequisite: High level of sexual frustration
245 Advanced Petting
- For the truly cautious lover, this
course is offered to bridge the gap between the introductory
courses and the more advanced stages of sex. Students will
get a firm grasp of their subjects. A hands-on class with
little or no discussion.
263 Phallic Symbols and Civilization
- Phallic symbols will
be examined, with frequent trips outside of class to examine
these symbols in nature. The grocery store will offer looks
at hot dogs, cucumbers, polish sausages, and pickles. Trips
abroad will reveal the majesty of the Leaning Tower of Pisa,
the Empire State Building, and the ever-popular Washington
Monument. Phallic symbols and how they affect the way we
think and act. Prerequisite: Your favorite phallic symbol
265 Sexual Ethics
- This course will address the basic
ethical problems of sex. Inherent moral questions will be
asked, such as "How many hours should I know someone before I
have sex with them?", "Is it okay to make him sleep in the
wet spot?", "How can I keep from laughing as he undresses?",
"How much should I tip?", "Should I applaud?", and "Why do
they always say 'Was it good for you'?". All attempts will
be made to remove moral behavior an replace it with the
Lascivian Code of Sexual Ethics.
277 Sex Symbols Throughout the Ages
- We will examine sexy
people throughout history like Cleopatra, who was 4'2" and
weighed 150 lbs. Mark Antony, however, found that she didn't
have to drop to her knees and he could rest his drink on her
head while she 'worked'. Other sex symbols will be examined:
Jayne Mansfield, Rudolph Valentino, Cheryl Tiegs, and Rob
Lowe. What makes a sex symbols? Why do we get horny when we
look at them? How did Billy Joel get a babe like Christy
Brinkley? For that matter, why on earth did Marilyn Monroe
marry both Joe DeMaggio and Arthur Miller? I mean, I can see
boffing, JFK, but MILLER? Gimme a break.
281 Sex and the Workplace
- Sex and your job and how they
relate. Sex is a reality of the workplace. Sometimes, sex
is a reality IN the workplace, but that's another story
altogether. Sex is a useful tool and can be used to your
advantage. We will examine people who have used sex to
advance themselves in their jobs. Special guest speakers:
Jim Bakker, Gary Hart, Jimmy Swaggart. An internship as a
Senatorial page, altar boy, etc., is suggested here.
Prerequisite: A high-ranking government job
- No, this is NOT having sex in a car.
Playing with yourself will be the focus of this course. We
will look at the taboo of 'spanking your monkey till it
pukes', and the many facets of self-pleasure for both men and
women. A special individual project will be available for
the truly advanced student.
- Woody Allen once said "Being bisexual
automatically doubles your chances for a date." Attention
will be paid to anal sex, lubrication, and the concealing of
small, furry mammals.
325-326 Deviant Fetishes
- The first semester includes an
in-depth look at heavy S & M. Duct tape, rubber diapers, and
whips will be used. Second semester will involve groups,
animals, groups of animals, necrophelia, incest, and naked
midget oil wrestling, among other things.
352 Silly Names for Genitalia
- This course is entirely
devoted to the human inability to refer to their private
parts by their medical terminology. Males, especially, have
a great deal of trouble saying the word...the word...well,
THAT word. You know the one. Your weenie. Your wacker,
pole, shaft, rode, gun, love machine. Your one-eyed wonder
worm. Your throbbing python of love. Your c---. Yeah.
That's the one.
369 Oral Sex
- An in-depth examination of fellatio and
cunninlingus with special emphasis on the lips, teeth and
tongue. Recommended: Sam Kinison's "Licking The Alphabet"
416 Adult Films
- Students will study the process of making
one-day, shot-on-videotape blue move on a $3000 budget. They
will watch many, many adult films in a carefully reproduced
adult theater, complete with old men wearing their overcoats
backwards, and cum stains on the seats. At the end of the
semester, students will have the opportunity to produce and
star in their own porn movie.
483 The Kama Sutra
- This course, for advanced students only,
will study the ancient Kama Sutra, the oriental guide to
complete lovemaking. Students will be expected to be
proficient in every single thing in the book and to go
through it at least once. There will be regular tests as
well as many 'pop' quizzes. Recommended for majors only