It's A Dog's Life (or Why Dogs Are Better Than Women)

  • Dogs don't cry.
  • Dogs love it when your friends come over.
  • A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
  • If you leave the toilet lid up, it makes it easier for a dog to get a drink.
  • Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
  • The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
  • Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
  • Dogs don't notice when you call them by another dog's name.
  • Dogs are excited by rough play.
  • Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
  • Dogs understand that farts are funny.
  • Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
  • Anyone can get a good looking dog.
  • If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
  • Dogs don't shop.
  • Dogs like it when you leave things on the floor.
  • A Dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
  • Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
  • A dog's parents never visit.
  • Dogs love long car trips.
  • Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking directions.
  • When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly, you can shoot it.
  • Dogs like beer.
  • No dog ever put on a hundred pounds after reaching adulthood.
  • Dogs agree that you have to raise you voice to get your point across.
  • It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.
  • Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you had.
  • Dogs don't worry about germs.
  • Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
  • You never have to wait for a dog, they are ready to go 24 hours a day.
  • Dogs have no use for flowers, cards or jewelry.
  • Dogs don't borrow you shirts.
  • Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
  • Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
  • Dogs can't talk.
  • Dogs seldom out live you.

Submitted By: Holly CLifton
Jul 14, 1997 13:15

This joke is rated: PG