Two years ago, I wrote a scathing review of Success is a Choice, a motivational book by Boston Celtic basketball coach Rick Pitino. Now, I assumed that I was through picking on the man, but then last week I walked into the bookstore and discovered that Pitino has released a follow-up -- the humbly titled Lead to Succeed: 10 Traits of Great Leadership in Life.
I immediately flipped through it, and surprisingly it was so good that I just had to buy it. Oh, just in case you're wondering, in that last sentence, by "good," I mean "delightfully horrendous and appalling." By "buy," I mean that the store allows you to return any book you purchase within one week for a full refund.
You have to hand it to Coach Pitino. After all, who else would be arrogant enough to name his book Lead to Succeed, when the abysmal basketball team he coaches has won just ninety of the 214 games he has coached? He may have won a college basketball championship in 1996, but his Boston Celtics haven't even come close to making the playoffs since he started. What's next, Coach? Custer's The Drive for Success?
His books are supposed to help us learn how to lead, but of course they are mostly about Rick Pitino and how great Rick Pitino happens to be. After reading Lead to Succeed, I'm seriously not sure why he didn't just call the book I Rock by Rick Pitino. After all, that's pretty much his entire theme.
When he's not providing examples of his brilliance, he's issuing excuse after excuse for his recent losing. In fact, what's most amazing is his propensity to blame his players so bitterly. And he somehow manages to do this while simultaneously preaching the importance of having a positive attitude. At one point, he even reveals that he likes to perform background checks on employees and meet their spouses to make sure that they are "upbeat, positive people."
But how then to explain how Coach Positive can snipe at his players like this:
I'm not much of a leader, but don't you think that writing a book and using your own employees as examples of bad behavior might not be the best method of -- oh, I don't know -- leadership?
The book is divided into ten chapters with each chapter focusing on one of the "ten great traits of leadership in life." Just so you don't have to buy the book and give this guy any more money on top of the $7 million a year he's already getting from coaching, I've decided to list all ten traits right here. You know, as a public service. Because I care.
So what does it take to be a leader? Well, damned if I know. The book is full of the banal advice you would expect, but, with all his contradictions, Pitino still doesn't show anyone how to be a leader. The closest he gets is in the introduction when he tells us that "[l]eaders are only effective when they effectively lead the people of whom they're in charge." Well, gee, Coach, thanks for clearing that one up.
Of course, I'd love to tell you more about the book, but unfortunately I just don't have the time. You see, in order to get a refund, I have to get it back to the bookstore by tomorrow, and if there's just one thing I've learned from Lead to Succeed, it is this:
I certainly don't want to end up spending any money on it.
|Copyright 2000 by Joe Lavin
Joe Lavin's Humor Column is published every Tuesday at: http://joelavin.com
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Submitted By: Joe Lavin
May 31, 2000 13:17