How To Tell If Marv Albert Has Been In Your Hotel Room
  1. Sign on door amended to read "Maximum Occupancy: 4 persons (or 2 transsexuals and a sportscaster)"
  2. The drawers are filled with Rebecca Lobo designer brand garters and panties in "Super Plus" sizes.
  3. When have you ever seen a hotel shoeshine rag with tape on one side and dandruff on the other?
  4. Bathroom reeks like someone with "nervous trial stomach" just left.
  5. You're bra is missing. Your panties are missing. The rug is missing.
  6. The bed is mussed, and even though it had been mussed willingly in the past, that's no reason to expect it not to press charges this time.
  7. Dennis Rodman drops by to get his panties and garter belt back.
  8. Lipstick scrawled on the bathroom mirror reads, "If the panties don't fit, you must acquit!"
  9. The big dent in the mattress, the size XXXXL orange turtleneck, two dozen empty quarts of Good Humor ice cream, and a keg of chocolate sauce. (Oops! That's a sign *FAT* Albert's been in your hotel room.)
  10. Bubba Smith keeps sending up roses and chocolate.
  11. Throw rug on the floor is only 8 inches in diameter.
  12. A quick jump on the bed releases one last lingering echo of "YESSSS!!!!"
  13. "Marv was here" gnawed into headboard of bed.
  14. "Saturday" missing from your day-of-the-week panty collection.
  15. There's a toupee on the nightstand and a career in the toilet.

Submitted By: Doug "Yes, That's My Real Name" Sunshine
Oct 10, 1997 12:57

This joke is rated: PG