Warning Lables

Every now and then we stumble across a package instruction that leaves us scratching our head -- or raising our eyebrows. Four cases in point:
  1. Once you've read the instructions on a box of Pepperidge Farm frozen raspberry turnovers, it's too late to obey them: "Preheat oven to 475 degrees F before taking package from the freezer."
  2. For incorrigible narcissists, Conair offers this safety tip with its hair dryers: "Never use while sleeping."
  3. A New Jersey reader was surprised to read the "patient counseling" instructions a local pharmacist typed onto a recent prescription for her cat. "Do not mix with alcohol," it warned. "Use caution when driving or operating machinery." Our reader noted, "We had no idea what the cat was up to when he felt good!"
  4. But the real eye-opener comes from Japanese manufacturer Yamaha. While perusing the assembly instructions for his new Electric Grand keyboard, a reader found a diagram showing assorted pieces of hardware and labeled with a single Anglo-Saxon word of instruction. We can't repeat the instruction in this family magazine, but we believe the company meant "screw".

Submitted By: Anonymous
Jan 1, 1998 13:41

This joke is rated: G