| What They Say | What They Mean |
|---|---|
| In Any Situation | |
| I'm hungry | I'm hungry |
| I'm sleepy | I'm sleepy |
| I'm tired | I'm tired |
| One-On-One Situation | |
| Do you want to go to a movie? | I'd eventually like to have sex with you. |
| Can I take you out to dinner? | I'd eventually like to have sex with you. |
| Can I call you sometime? | I'd eventually like to have sex with you. |
| May I have this dance? | I'd eventually like to have sex with you. |
| Nice dress! | Nice cleavage |
| You look tense, let me give you a massage | I want to fondle you. |
| In A Group | |
| Anyone want to go eat? | I want to go eat |
| Who wants to see this movie? | Do we have to see this movie? |
| Who wants to see this movie? | Doesn't anyone else want to see this movie? |
| Already Trapped in a "Relationship" | |
| What's wrong? | I don't see why are you making such a big deal out of this. |
| What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now? | |
| Oh no! Not again! | |
| WHAT IS IT NOW? | |
| Quit whining! | |
| Oh god of all creatures big and small, please don't let it be a long one! | |
| I guess sex tonight is out of the question. | |
| Yes dear | Bitch! |
| I'm bored | Do you want to have sex? |
| I love you | Let's have sex now. |
| I love you too | Now why did you have to say that, it makes my stomach turn. |
| Yes, I missed you | How else do you expect me to answer that? |
| And how I missed you | Bitch! |
| Answering to her "Did you think that girl was pretty" Question | |
| She was alright | If an elephant came into the room, would I not see it? |
| Sure, let's go see that play | I don't want to go, but you'll make my life miserable if I don't go. |
| Yes, I like the way you cut your hair | I liked it better before. |
| 50 bucks and it doesn't look that much different! | |
| For 50 bucks they should have given you more hair instead of taking some away. | |
| Let's talk | I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me. |
| Hello, FTD? I'd like to send some flowers to my girlfriend/wife... | This ought to shut her up for a while at the expense of some humiliation from my male peers. |
| This ought to secure sex with her tonight! | |
| While Shopping | |
| I like that one better | pick any freakin' dress and let's go home! |
| I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together | I am gay |
| Suicide | |
| Will you marry me? | I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys. |
| I might as well get tax benefits for going through these "talks" | |
| I don't want to have "talks" over the phone anymore. | |
Submitted By: Anonymous