Why I Fired My Secretary

Two weeks ago, was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went into breakfast, knowing my wife would be pleasant and say Happy Birthday and probably have a present for me. She didn't even say Good Morning, let alone any Happy Birthday. I said, "well, that's wives for you. The children will remember." The children came into breakfast and didn't say a word. When I started to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, Janet said, "Good Morning, Boss. Happy Birthday," and I felt a little better -- someone had remembered. I worked until noon. About noon Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, Let's go to lunch, just you and me."
I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I have heard all day. Let's go."

We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out into the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day, we don't need to go back to the office, do you?"
I said, "No, I guess not."
She said, "Let's go to my apartment."

After arriving at her apartment, we had another martini and smoked a cigarette and she said, " Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." I allowed her to do so, as I didn't mind at all. She went into the bedroom and in about six minutes she came out of the bedroom carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my wife and children.

All were singing Happy Birthday, and there I sat ... with nothing on but my socks!


Submitted By: Bob F

This joke is rated: PG