How To Answer The Phone
Sound like an operator and make a tape saying:
"I'm sorry, the number that has dialed you is not in service. Will
you please hang up and let it dial again... I'm sorry, the..."
"Hello, is this the person to whom I am speaking?"
- My solution is upon realizing that I'm talking with a "telemarketing
representative", I ask: "Are you a telemarketer?" The answer
(suprisingly) is usually yes. I then go into a sales pitch to
sell a (nonexistant) telephone ear-cusion.
I insist that every telemarketer must have one for safety and comfort.
Eventually, they'll forget to try selling me anything.
- A recent posting by Duke McMullan requested ways to repel telephone
solicitors. My friend Pepe Tres from Texas told me this one and gave
permission to post it:
"My time is billed at $125 per hour. To continue this
conversation, I must have your MasterCard or Visa number, card
type and date of expiration."
Pepe says it usually leaves them speechless. One guy replied, "Hey,
that's good; I'll have to remember it." Once a supervisor of
telephone solicitors called back and asked him if he was "some kind of
Everybody gets and dials wrong numbers. It's good to be nice about it. What
goes around comes around, right? so, I try to reassure the apologetic and
embarrassed wrong dialers that will actually converse once the error is
discovered, with it going something like this:
caller w. wrong number: "Gee, I'm sorry..."
me: "That's OK, I was going to pick up the phone anyway.."
- How about the 'Fraudian Slip Answer'? Like this:
here. What can I do to-----I MEAN-----FOR you?
- Try the following next time the phone rings:
You (when you answer): Hello, is Jimmy there?
Caller: No, I'm afraid you have a wrong number.
You: Oh. Sorry.
Caller: No problem... (click)
Submitted By: Anonymous
This joke is rated: PG