A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, her nine year old son hides in the closet and watches them. One day the woman hears a car pull into the driveway and tells her lover to hide in the closet, as she fears he will not be able to sneak out fast enough.

Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in here, isn't it?
"Yes it is," the man replies nervously, realizing that they've been observed in a very compromising situation.
"You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks.
"No thanks," the man replies.
"I think you DO want to buy a baseball," the little extortionist continues.
"OK. How much?" the man replies after considering the position he's in.
"Twenty-five dollars," the little boy replies.
"TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!" the man repeats incredulously, but complies to keep the kid quiet.

The following week, the lover is visiting the woman again when she hears a car in the driveway and, again, asks him to hide in the closet.

"Dark in here, isn't it?" the boy starts off.
"Yes it is," replies the man, whispering.
"Wanna buy a baseball glove?" the little boy asks.
"OK. How much?" the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his disadvantage.
"Fifty dollars," the boy replies and the transaction is completed.

The next weekend, the little boy's father says "Hey, son. Go get your ball and glove and we'll play some catch."
"I can't. I sold them," replies the little boy.
"How much did you get for them?" asks the father, expecting to hear the profit in terms of lizards and candy.
"Seventy-five dollars," the little boy says.
"SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?! That's thievery! I'm taking you to the church right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness!", the father explains as he hauls the child away.

At the church, the little boy goes into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says "Boy, it's dark in here, isn't it?"
"Don't you start that s--- in HERE now," the priest says.