Seniors Vs. Freshmen

Are never in bed past noon. Are never out of bed before noon.
Read the syllabus to find out what classes they can cut. Read the syllabus to find out what classes they need to attend.
Brings a can of soda into a lecture hall. Brings a jumbo hoagie and six-pack of Mtn. Dew into a recitation class.
Calls the professor "Professor." Calls the professor "Bob."
Would walk ten miles to get to class. Drives to class if it's further than three blocks away.
Memorizes the course material to get a good grade. Memorizes the professor's habits to get a good grade.
Knows a book-full of useless trivia about the university. Knows where the next class is. Maybe...
Shows up at a morning exam clean, perky, and fed. Shows up at a morning exam in sweats with a cap on and a box of pop tarts in hand.
Have to ask where the computer labs are. Has 'own' personal workstation.
Use the campus buses to go everywhere. Use the campus buses to run block while crossing the street.
Worry about the last freshman composition essay. Worry about the last GRE essay.
Lines up for an hour to buy his textbooks in the first week. Starts to think about buying textbooks in October... maybe.
Looks forward to first classes of the year Looks forward to first beer garden of the year
Is proud of his A+ on Calculus I midterm Is proud of not _quite_ failing his Complex Analysis midterm
Calls his girlfriend back home every other night Calls Domino's every other night
Is appalled at the class size and callousness of profs Is appalled that the campus 'Subway' burned down over the summer
Conscienciously completes all homework, including optional questions Offers to 'tutor' conscientious fresh of opposite sex...
Goes on grocery shopping trip with Mom before moving onto campus Has a beer with Mom before moving onto campus
Is excited about the world of possibilities that awaits him, the unlimited vista of educational opportunities, the chance to expand one's horizons and really make a contribution to society Is excited about new dryers in laundry room
Takes meticulous four-color notes in class Occasionally stays awake for all of class

Submitted By: Anonymous

This joke is rated: PG
Tags: College list