Is Softball Better Than Sex?

  • You can play softball as much or as little as you want; YOU get to decide.

  • After an unusually long and difficult softball game you can still ride your bike home.

  • In softball, the other team pays attention throughout, even if they're done scoring.

  • If you have to take a piss during a softball game, you can say "Excuse me, I gotta drain the swamp" and you don't lose style points.

  • In softball, nobody comments on the size of your bat, as long as you know what to do with it.

  • In softball, you don't feel guilty about winning the ugly ones.

  • The other team never has to forfeit a game cause they're on their period.

  • In softball, you don't have to compliment the other team on good they look in their new uniforms.

  • You don't have to buy the other team dinner to get a game.

  • If you get all scratched up in a softball game, you can brag about it to your wife.

  • In softball, if you go a couple months without scoring, your balls don't hurt.

  • In softball, you can play the same team every day for a year and it's never the same twice.

  • You don't mind if your parents come to watch you play softball.

  • You can play three, maybe four softball games a day.

  • In softball, it's no concern of yours if the other team has had marital relations with diseased livestock.

  • In a good weekend of softball, you can play six or seven different teams and it only costs you twenty bucks and you may get a prize at the end.

  • Playing the wrong softball team won't get you shot.

  • You can be absolutely certain that, nine months after a softball game, the other teams lawyers won't call, asking for half of your pre-tax income for the next eighteen years.

  • During a softball game you can spit tobacco juice all over the place.

  • Rest assured that the other team will not invite you to the ballet.

  • The other team doesn't demand that you shave before the game.

  • The other team can smell like road kill and you'll never know it.

  • If you don't score in a softball game, the other team doesn't ask you if you've had that problem often.

  • No matter how drunk the other team is they never throw up in your bed.

Submitted By: Anonymous

This joke is rated: PG